Pain series: Part 4

I just looked out my window and saw four teenagers passing around the biggest blunt I’ve ever seen. It’s 420 which means everyone is high, planning to get high, or coming down off of a high. I’m never indulge but sometimes wish that I could simply for the medicinal pain relief that I would feel. Now the guys are singing, enjoying whatever high they’ve got left for the next few hours.

I watched a video on my surgery today. It was an animated educational film, but it still made me nervous and kind of freaked me out a little bit. I probably shouldn’t have watched it but I was curious about what it’s going to happen to me. I have an appointment on May 1 for a physical and a consultation with the nurse who will be helping me through everything. Her name is Jackie. I’ve talk to her a few times on the phone and she always makes me feel like everything is going to be OK.

I watched another video of a guy in his 60s who had the same surgery I’m going to have and he was about six weeks out. He said he wasn’t experiencing any pain at the moment but that the first few weeks were really rough, but he couldn’t do anything by himself, go to the bathroom by himself, and that he can’t lift his baby grandchild at all. That seem pretty rough but trading some really bad short-term pain for a lifetime of bad pain just seems worth it to me. 

Starting to get nervous, but trying to keep things in perspective. I’m going to have a lot of help and a lot of people who love me around, that’s going to be nice and keep my mind at ease.

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